The Best Ghost Movies You've Never Seen

The Conjuring sucked.

There, I said it.

I haven’t read the book (House Of Darkness, House Of Light by Andrea Perron) upon which the film was based, save for one snippet I happened upon whilst researching the backstory. Said snippet stated that the malevolent entity encountered in the Perron’s remote Rhode Island farmhouse resembled “a lifeless beehive with vermin crawling all over it. Its head was leaning off to one side. It was round and gray, resembling a dessicated hornet’s nest.” Sounds pretty gruesome, right? I mean, that would scare the shit out of anyone. Right? So did they use it in the movie? Of course not! Why go with something truly disturbing when you can simply hire an alcoholic bag lady wearing a fright wig to crouch on top of your rented chifferobe?

Sigh. Have we all truly forgotten how to tell a good ghost story? Is it just going to be a long walk through a cheap haunted funhouse from here on out? The Conjuring, Insidious, fucking Annabelle...I haven’t seen one single goddamned major release horror movie that gives me any sort of hope for the future. True gothic horror and all of the stomach-sinking, pre-diarrhea paranoia that went along with it has been replaced by lame jump scares, obvious BOO! build-ups and monsters who pale in comparison beside your average Wal-Mart shopper.

 The 10 Best Ghost Movies You've Never Seen

1 – Lake Mungo. I cannot recommend this movie enough. Filled with twists and turns, and yet subtle in tone, this movie is deeply upsetting and scary as all hell, and I know of more than one seasoned horror fan who screamed aloud when confronted with the climactic reveal.

2 – The Changeling. No, not the Angelina Jolie flick. This is a sadly neglected 80s gem starring George C. Scott, Trish Van Devere and the world’s creepiest wicker wheelchair. Cobwebs, seances, slamming doors and unearthly echoes – this film has everything you could possibly want in a ghost story.

3 – Shutter (2004). Fuck the remake. I implore you to seek out this original Thai masterpiece about guilt and ghost photography. You may think you know what’s going on, but you don’t. And it’s the little things along the way that make the final “A HA!” moment all the more terrifying.

4 – The Devil’s Backbone. This unofficial prequel to Pan’s Labyrinth gives us ghost as good guys, who want nothing more than to keep the living from harm. Still, this doesn’t make the appearance of a white eyed ghost boy with an eternal head wound leaking ghostly blood vapor any less horrific.

5 – Stir Of Echoes. One of the few examples of a movie being scarier than the book it was originally based upon. A missing girl, a hippie hypnotist and a blue collar Chicago backdrop make this an accesible, modern-day ghost flick, but its roots are firmly entrenched in the Gothic tradition.

6 – The Haunted (TV – 1991). This movie seems silly now, but considering it was a made for TV effort, coming in at the end of the era when made for TV movies did NOT automatically equal shit, this has a lot going for it. A sinister stain that refuses to be covered, a cyclone of darkness that moves around at will, voices that come from everywhere and nowhere – it’s still startling, if not as scary as it was 20 years ago. Also, the sight of Jeffrey DeMunn being raped by a ghost who looks like Courtney Love is…amusing, in a shuddery kinda way.

7 – The Innocents. Oh man, this movie. I could spend two hours in a dark basement, naked, listening to an audio book on the life and crimes of Albert Fish and still not feel as dirty as this movie made me feel. Oh sure, it’s all elegant English gardens and polite tea parties on the lawn superficially, but just tip it up a bit and its underbelly is ripe with rot and maggots, busily squirming.

8 – The Entity. Okay so the climactic liquid helium scene was kind of a reach, but the hour or so leading up to that is true horror. Bad enough that a ghost is hanging out in your house, making eerie noises and casting spooky shadows. But when it actually starts violently fucking you? Oh hell no. Features one of the most chilling closing lines of dialogue ever featured in a horror movie.

9 – The Haunting (1963). Shirley fucking Jackson, the Master of the Everyday Maladies, crafted this tale of a pre-Carrie girl finally daring to emerge from her chrysalis, with drastic results. Guilt, repressed sexuality and psychic powers make our human catalyst Nell a bad match for a severely haunted house, but a great plot for a truly terrifying ghost tale.

10 – Session 9. The sadly demolished Danvers State Insane Asylum is the star of this deeply unsettling tale about the concentrated impact of madness, illness and death on a physical space. The asylum has birthed its own genius loci, and watching it swallow the human cast one by one is like watching a snake unhinge its jaw to swallow an egg.

The Seven Scariest Ghost Books You've Never Read:

 

1 – The Red Tree (Caitlin Kiernan). A disturbed woman whose lover has recently committed suicide moves into a dilapidated house in rural Rhode Island. A manuscript left behind by the previous occupant and the presence of a giant red oak tree on the property begin to unravel what is left of the woman’s sanity.

2 – The Good House (Tananarive Due). Cajun mysticism finds it way to the Pacific Northwest and moves into an old farmhouse, there to torment the descendants of a powerful Voodoo Queen. This descriptive tale of demonic possession and exorcism will make your skin crawl.

3 – House Of Leaves  (Mark Danielewski). If mental illness could be extracted from a diseased human skull and laid out on paper, it would look a lot like Danielewski’s labyrinthine book, filled with backward masking, insane footnotes and a text so genuinely eerie you’ll be afraid that prolonged contact with the pages may contaminate you. This isn’t so much a book as it is a blueprint of both a fractured psyche and a house which may or may not be real.

4 – The Shunned House (H.P. Lovecraft). One of my favorite short stories by Lovecraft turns the haunted house tale on its ear, doing away with wispy phantoms and ethereal wraiths and instead giving us a monstrous foundation and poisoneous soil upon which nothing can live for very long.

5 – Grave’s End (Elaine Mercado). This is the true story of recently divorced ER nurse and mother of two Mercado, whose Brooklyn home is filled to bursting with every manner of ghost you can imagine. For over a decade, Mercado, her kids and even her asshole ex husband are tormented by sinister sounds, putrid smells and even physical attacks. Plainly told and totally compelling.

6 – Hell House (Richard Matheson). Somewhere in Maine, there is a house swathed in a sulphurous green fog. Once upon a time, it was the scene of every form of debauchery and depravity known to man. Now it is a boarded up ruin, shunned by all with common sense. Hired by a dying geezer with a morbid fear of the unknown which awaits him, a parapsychologist, his insecure wife and two psychics are sent to investigate “Hell House” and prove one way or the other if there is indeed life after death.

7 – A Good & Happy Child (Justin Evans). Why can’t young husband George hold his newborn son, or even bring himself to touch him? The answers lie in his mostly forgotten childhood, when the death of his father triggers a series of strange occurrences, up to and including exorcism and murder. Has George really escaped the shadow of evil, or was it merely waiting for the right time to resurface and target his new family? Okay so technically this is a tale of demonic possession, but you can't have a demon infested house without all of the classic elements of a haunting being present.

So there, horror directors. Stop with the paranormal activities and the ugly dolls and the scary hair and the silly music cues. Branching out is fine, but remember your roots. In reaching for the sky, you’re forgetting about the darkness below your own feet. The real horror is there, in the ground, feeding you on darkness and decay. We’re sick of the taste of fertilizer. Give us some good, old fashioned graveyard dirt for a change.